Cock Knocker

IMG_2600Ha ha ha ha ha! Also, tee hee hee hee hee. Oh the wanking great irony. Chest flare up slowly improving but requires another week of medication. So to kick me in the proverbials my stomach muscles are twisted to fuckery by over-coughing. Ow! Ha ha ha ha ha! I’d laugh my cock off only it hurts too much to even chuckle. Plus my cock fell off in 2005 during that self-flagellating anti-Blair protest.

So I’m grumpy. Nothing new about that. I’m grumpy and I’m watching things I know I’ll hate on Netflix. Which is a newish way of ensuring I have something to be fucked off with, something that doesn’t really matter, something that isn’t real. Clever, huh? Not really, it just means I end up shouting “As if anyone would ever get behind a rebellion led by plastic-brow, single facial expression Jennifer Lawrence!” And then my neighbours yell through the wall because it’s four in the morning. And then I blow up the wall with a grenade and murder my neighbours. Then spend hours rebuilding the wall and working on an alibi only to blow the alibi by admitting I murdered them in my blog. Fucking amateur.

And now a word from our sponsor: “Coca Cola is liquid excrement. Drink blood instead. Brought to you by the Bloody Good Drinky Company.”

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