Stupid dentists not being able to see people immediately. Stupid teeth being all stupid. Stupid me for all the amphetamines and Jolly Ranchers (the former from the distant past, the latter more recently).
If you see me over the next couple of weeks and I sort of shy away, mumble and generally act like I don’t want to talk to you, it’s not you, it’s my own self-conscious awareness that lacking a tooth makes me feel ugly.
You know, on top of my actual face and all.
I’ll be able to pretend I’m human again in about a fortnight once I’ve insisted they knocked me out and take all my remaining teeth away. See you then. Sorry if I dribble from the operation and spit through my new dentures.