The outside world is a wanker. A massive wanker populated by irritating fuckwits and bollockheads. It’s also full of surprise rainfall. The outside world can go suck a bag of dicks.
I had to do a couple of chores. Annoying humans made the simplest of activities complex and more difficult than they needed to be. Going to the doctors surgery to spend a couple of minutes filling out a repeat prescription form turned into fifteen minutes of frustration as some selfish cunt decided that they didn’t need to worry that they would block in the two solitary disabled parking spots by planting their car in the middle of the minuscule car park and swanning off somewhere entirely other than the surgery or the pharmacy. They seemed somewhat astonished that I and the other driver blocked in by their self-centred cavalier attitude to parking restrictions had rendered us rather angry. Prick!
I wanted to grab a few essentials at the supermarket too. Sadly I chose a busy day so headed for the self-service check-out to avoid long queues. All of those who queued at that moment were out of the supermarket ahead of me as the machine I was dealing with decided with every single scan that it didn’t recognise the item and required an assistant to come along and do tip tap code shit on its screen. She could tell I was fuming by the fourth incident and chose to explain it to me in a patronising voice using words that lacked logic and coherence and therefore failed to equate to an explanation. Needless to say this added to my fume.
“I fucking hate machines and morons!” I muttered to myself as I headed for my car whilst being battered by a sudden downpour. A trolley collecting, high-viz wearing moron (or machine) overhead me and checked to see if I needed kicking in the knackers. I am taller than him, a rare occurrence and one which assured my knackers remained un-kicked.
Home now where the only moron is me. The outside world can fuck the fucking fuck off until it’s time to pick up my meds on Monday.