Another week of small encouragements on the health front and of seeing friends. It’s all left me very tired so Saturday has been a blur of bed and waking to go to the lavatory and then more sleep. Yet there is a difference between the fatigue of endless inactivity, the like of which has especially characterised the last fifteen months, and the exhaustion that comes from enjoyable exertion. Both distress the body, only the former ravages the heart.
Exertion always seems an odd choice of words to me now as the level to which I am able to exert myself is so much lower than it once was, so much lower than I would wish it to be. Things, as ever, are what they are so I have to find comfort in measurements other than how strong or capable my body is.
Not so very long ago the thread of most of my blog posts was about a lost sense of meaning in my life. Meaning is a less palpable measurement than physical strength yet I cannot deny that the last two weeks especially have allowed for greater meaning to inhabit my actions and my ambitions once more. Because I have spent time with treasured people, because I have felt the stirrings of academic thought creating more orderly form to my mind.
And because of cake, obviously. Today’s cake has been a slice of Belgian chocolate goodness and I intend to consume another slice very soon, now that I’ve got the less chocolatey business of ingesting vegetables, a little protein and some carbohydrates out of the way. As John Lennon once said “The Beatles aren’t bigger than Cake.” Wise words, Winston, wise words indeed.