Category Archives: Blogging

Nothing To Report?

Thursday’s physio beat the crap out of me and it wasn’t even that exacting a session. Most of the weekend has vanished into fatigue, sleep and muscular ouch, my biggest achievement being the cooking of a curry in the microwave. … Continue reading

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Ministry of Silly Foods

All together now, read from psalm number 8 in your Brexitbook: “The shortage of salady bits and some vegetables in our supermarkets is entirely caused by Putin and has nothing to do with fucking up import processes by leaving the … Continue reading

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Fourjan

There was a third of January but I decided to be asleep for lots of it. And now it’s a fourth and I’m feeling wide-eyed and raring to go. I’m lying, I still feel tired: I always feel tired. Ask … Continue reading

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The First Ninety Minutes Are The Most Important

The footballs as we know the will never be the same again, not now the English League of Premiers has stopped mid-season to allow for a World Cup to take place in Qatar. Which controversial element of that sentence would … Continue reading

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And His Name Is Wiggly Woo

“In the beginning was the worm and the worm was…”  Oh, word not worm. Well that’s an opening to a book I’ve been misinterpreting most of my life, then. I did think it was a bit weird that the Old … Continue reading

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Where’s Robespierre When You Need Him?

This is an enlightened age. In the past social misdemeanours or failure to meet the demands of high office could be punished by public humiliations, even execution. Tarring and feathering, flogging, being put in the stocks or, if it was … Continue reading

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As In A Mirror

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. I played marbles and conkers and had loads of Action Men and cut pictures out of magazines to stick in … Continue reading

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Don’t Worry If It’s Not Good Enough

‘The trick with songwriting is to do the opposite of whatever you do when you’re not writing a song.’ Darven Crumble, 1973. Wise words from Darven there, a giant of 70s rock music you’ve forgotten about until I made him … Continue reading

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Ed ‘Stewpot’ Stewart (is not part of this post)

There are now only umpty-diddle hippo-strangling days until they pass that pesky law forbidding me anyone from strangling hippos. It’s as though nobody is allowed a little harmful innocent fun these days. These days, if you say you’re Stewart Lee, … Continue reading

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Water Time To Be Alive

This is your November Is Happening Now warning. Be careful out there. People will burn things and send explodey, colourful missiles into the sky. Men will grow moustaches. Warmth will stop visiting as often as it did in October. Shops … Continue reading

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