Monthly Archives: May 2020

Cry Havoc

I’m not a fan of the Conservative Party here in an increasingly disunited kingdom of not very great any more Britain. Never have been and my expectations of the current crop when it came to dealing with the viral pandemic … Continue reading

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Camused To Death

‘Everybody knows that pestilences have a way of recurring in the world; yet somehow we find it hard to believe in ones that crash down on our heads from a blue sky. There have been as many plagues as wars … Continue reading

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Don’t Tell Me On a Friday

Being awake is overrated of a Friday. As is being away from bed for longer than required to urinate or top up on the liquids necessary to create urine. As I have done a few hours awake and away from … Continue reading

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Oh No, Not Again

Looking up from having been looking down, I notice that Thursday is lumbering towards a conclusion. I grin, but a thin-lipped sort of grin that I reserve for moments when I might as well have just realised one of my … Continue reading

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Socks Mad

Who even wears socks during lockdown? Not me, that’s for sure. Except on the days that I do, which is also for sure. Ankle rules are different now, like they were in Victorian times only the opposite to that because … Continue reading

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Stay Elite

Frankly I am astonished that anybody is astonished to discover that there might be an elite class who set rules for the rest of us to follow but which they themselves are allowed to bend, break and even bugger up … Continue reading

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In Two Hundred Millimetres, Turn Left

Oh hello, you caught me right in the middle of the absolutely nothing I’ve been doing for nine weeks. I’ll just wash my hands. And burn my clothes. And hide any SatNav evidence I may have been to visit Dominic … Continue reading

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Understood, José

If you wanna break eggs you got to make an omelette. Those are the rules I just invented. Well, the single rule. It might be different if you’re married or in a relationship but that’s the single rule. I broke … Continue reading

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Leg End

I’ve had an advance preview of the weekend and I must say it’s looking really good for all those who like being at home and eating eggy bread while staring at their socks. But wait, what’s this? I haven’t got … Continue reading

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Brain The Size of a Planet (Harris)

If you like your Fridays stupid then you’re in luck. This one is the stupidest Friday since the last stupid Friday. It’s no good at algebra, hasn’t read any books, thinks Michelangelo painted the Sixteenth Chapel and eats its breakfast … Continue reading

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